Dear Addiction, I HATE YOU!

Dear Addiction,

There you are back again pulling the rug right out from under me. You invade my thoughts, my dreams, even my life when I am awake.

You are always there. Watching. Waiting. Trying to get me to slip up and take solace in the sweet words you whisper as I sit there staring, trying to fight it with all my heart.

I HATE You. This is not who I am anymore. You may have had a hold on me, always pulling me down till I thought only pills and getting high was the answer. But guess what? No more.

I played into your hands for years. You almost destroyed everything I care the most about in the world. My family. My marriage. My friendships.

I almost lost everything because of you.

Oh, it’s my fault, you say? You are partically right. But you are also wrong. Yes, I chose to do the things I did, but you were the one whispering the ‘sweet nothings’ into my ears late at night.

You, dear Addiction, do not have a hold on me anymore. Yes you will always be there, but I know now that I do not have to listen to you. I am stronger than this. I can beat you.

You laugh at me, the sound echoing in my head. Saying I will never be free of you. That I will always be back.

But I won’t. I have something here that you can never match. I have a wonderful family. I have a amazing understanding husband. I have the strongest support system I could ever ask for.

So, my dear addiction, you and I are done. For good this time. And the best part? When I feel you trying to pull me back in to the darkness I used to consider my friend, I will have 1,000 friends and family pulling for me here.

I am not alone. But you are now. Enjoy the darkness, my old friend.

Credits photo: amenclinicsphotos ac